it really has been one of those days. after a bad night with upsetting dreams, i woke up feeling very low and tearful. i don't think turning my light off any earlier would have helped but it was midnight when i finally did turn i off.
i achieved nothing at all this morning. i sat on my bed with my laptop, emailing mum. she mentioned someone had a wheelbarrow with apples out in Sheering with a sign saying "Help yourself". so i did. 5 Brambleys about the right size for baking. but driving there i promptly burst into tears.
anyway whilst out i picked up some more beetroot from the lady at the end of Pond Lane (even though i have a huge bag on the kitchen window sill...) i decided some comforting beetroot soup might help me feel better. i got home and was about to plug in the blender having cooked and skinned the beetroot when the power went off (it covered the whole of Essex north of us it seems!)
that was at about 1.30pm. so much for my nice comforting soup. it was the straw that broke this camel's back. so i phoned mum before i broke down. i carried on with my smoked cod's roe - on bread though not toast hoping the power would return in time for me to carry on making my soup.
in an attempt to combat the saltiness of the roe i decided to try putting some lemon juice on it. however we only had some frozen slices which were stuck together. in the process of trying to separate the slices i managed to puncture my finger with the knife. although the wound isn't wide it is deep - judging my the subcutaneous tissue that started appearing from the wound.....
it was the final straw. even a phone call to mum couldn't contain the tears. so decided to talk a walk down the road to the doctors using the finger as the reason, even though the wouldn't wasn't all that worthy of a nurse, however my mental state was. of course being "one of those days" and in general the way my life goes, there wasn't a nurse at the surgery this afternoon. i could have gone to the sister surgery but i don't really know the HCA who was working there this afternoon anyway. but just getting out and talking to the receptionists helped slightly.
i got back home just before 3pm was about to consider ringing a tea room nearby to see if they had power when i heard the welcoming sound of the hum of the fridge. so no need to pay for a cuppa somewhere else after all.
when i was walking back from the doctors i saw an Indian woman delivering takeaway fliers. i was placing bets with myself as to whether she would put one through our letter box, despite our "no junk mail" sticker. of course she did. and my mood and the day so far i decided I'd return it to them by post - hence the photo at the beginning of the post - and i must say tearing up the flyer did relieve some tension and stress!