tonight the laptop worries and doubts are fading. today i installed both Norton 360 and office. i registered windows and Norton online, however couldn't find how to register office, but when i opened word tonight to transfer these blog entries that i had already typed in word pad, it then told me to register. by that time of course i had disconnected from the phone line upstairs and had moved to the dining table. when i clicked cancel it told me i could open office 24 more times without registering then i would expire. so i am back to typing in word pad for fear of using up those 24 chances.
however tonight proved another good side to the laptop for all of us to benefit from. when mum and i were in tescos they had some reasonably cheap DVDs, i spotted "stranger than fiction" which stars Emma Thompson. I'd seen her on BBC breakfast a few months back talking about the film. so we got it tonight when in tescos. but then when we were unpacking the shopping mum pointed out something that we had both forgotten about which is the fact that the HDD/DVD player has given up the ghost, and in fact at the moment there is a DVD of the modern version of "Alfie" stuck in the damn machine which now simply refuses to even turn on! so anyway we've had a nice evening watching the film on the laptop. the sound quality was good.
i had one small issue though - there is one pixel right in the middle of the screen that doesn't work it seems. its fine typing this, i don't notice it at all as the background is white. but when we were watching the film i found it so annoying. technically its a fault with the product so there shouldn't be an issues with getting it fixed i would hope. seen as I've only had the product a week and with the guarantee and extended cover I've paid for etc. David wasn't so sure though. so i will give comet a ring. mum was asking if i had to get it fixed whether all the stuff I've installed etc would be lost. but unless they can't just change the screen and have to give me a brand new machine that shouldn't be an issue.
i really should turn my light off and go to sleep. i can see when the wireless is up and running i am going to have trouble turning this off even more. i have to be in Harlow by 8am tomorrow morning. its flu jab time of year again and once again i have volunteered to help at Lister medical centre with David. I'm really not looking forward to it tomorrow. i just really don't feel in the mood. however apparently there were only 1000 jabs to start with and one of the GPs has been giving it to all the eligible patients he's seen in the last few days so with a limited number f jabs to give it should be a short morning.
to be honest though i am starting to dread and hate this time of night again. my dreams are upsetting every night again, not in a nasty way, bu more to do with the people in them or the places. I've had dreams about being in hospital again recently or things like self harm which have landed me in hospital. last night the upsetting thing was a person - Hazel Bailey my old German teacher from the college. i think about her often. i guess i kind of miss her. she's someone i respected, trusted, looked up to and i guess in someways depended on whilst i was at the college. know i was one of her star pupils and i don't care if the other kids thought i was her teachers pet. that woman helped me gain more confidence and belief in myself than anyone else ever has. for some reason my father's been popping up a lot recently. that's always a distressing one. it just means i dread going to sleep though because i don' want to dream. as far as i know though there's no way to stop dreams.
i ordered some flowers today to be sent to the hotel for mum and David. 3 gerberas, each in a bud vase. and I've started work on ideas for the picnic basket. so far the menu is:
· port and Stilton pate
· smoked mackerel and avocado pate
· Melba toasts
· bacon mushroom and rocket quiche
· quails eggs and watercress salad (details still to be decided on that one)
and for pudding a little individual tiramisu each.
11.13pm time to face the dreaded sleep, never mind only 7 hours til i have to wake up again, lets hope they pass quickly.